Many couples get together, get married, and hope things work out and if they don’t, they move on. A relationship with that kind of false hope is most likely doomed from the beginning.

Marriage is supposed to be a sacred contract for a lifetime commitment. It is not some kind of social contract or something you just “do” for as long as you both shall “love.” To me, that statement reeks of no commitment. However for many couples that seems to be the expectation.

Marriage is not an experiment, littered with prenuptial agreements; gushy platitudes and an attitude of “Try me! If it doesn’t work, you can always bail out!” Your vows must mean something for your relationship to prosper. This kind of commitment demands discipline and perseverance. Marriage is tough work – it does not “just happen.”

So. . . is it “for as long as you both shall love” or “for as long as you both shall live?”

Think about this: If we truly believe it is “for as long as you both shall live,” then perhaps we might choose our love partners differently!

We must live our lives with our love partners as if we are inventing a great love story.

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Copyright © 2009 - Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s Wedding Website. Larry James is a non-denominational minister and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! You will find more than 430 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com.

As photographers, Adam and I are there throughout the entire wedding process. We do our best to help you find other vendors, figure out your wedding timeline, offer advice on creative ideas to incorporate into you day… and we’re there behind the scenes. We see everything that happens on your wedding day. And with each wedding we photograph, we learn something new to bring with us. For example, we’ve upgraded our sewing kit scissors that we always have on us to a larger, sharper pair. Our scissors have been used to cut the rings off the pillow, cut hanger straps off of dresses, and cut the aisle ribbon so processional could start So, we thought we’d extend our help even further by offering our “Wedding Words of Wisdom,” which will be a regular addition to our blog now. Whenever we learn something new that can help with your wedding day, we’ll post it! This week, we have some words of wisdom about getting dressed.

1) Label the tuxes and bridesmaids dresses. You’d be surprised how often we see these mixed up. Actually, they were mixed up on our own wedding day, too. Adam said, “Dude, my pants are too long.” And our best man Dave said, “Dude, my pants are too short.” Then they realized that they had switched their pants. Oopsies. So they changed their pants in the car on their way to our wedding I’ve seen the same thing happen with bridesmaids. The simple task of labeling with save a lot of chaos.

2) You get your dress, you get it altered, and then it hangs in your closet until the wedding day, right? Ok, PLEASE DON’T DO THIS. People gain and lose weight, and you don’t want to figure that out on the day of the wedding when your dress suddenly doesn’t fit you right. Try your dress on a couple of months before the wedding so you can see if you need to alter your dress (or yourself) again.

3) Try your dress on (and get it altered) with the undergarments that you’ll be wearing on the wedding day. You’d be surprised at how many times I’ve seen women stitching their dress to their bra ON the wedding day because their bra is showing. Or they have to take their bra off entirely. Or they have to run home to try a different bra. You get the point. Also, walk around the house in different lighting (natural, warm bathroom lighting, florescent lighting, and bright outdoor lighting) to make sure you can’t see your undergarments through your dress in any circumstance.

4) Get clear deodorant. White marks on your dress (of any color) is not that pretty.

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Husband and wife creative team, Miranda and Adam of Reminisce Photography & Design share a passion for capturing life’s best… from your ‘everyday’ to your ‘Big Day.” They are photographers and artists who have a sensitive heart, trained eye and creative instinct.

We’ve been talking a lot about wedding photos recently, and we’re curious to learn what everyone does with their wedding photos. Please take a minute to fill out the poll below. (select all that apply)

We saw this video and had to share it. This is a very impressive proposal!

72% of all brides say they would have spent more time choosing their reception entertainment.

Almost 100% say they would have spent more of their budget on the entertainment.

During wedding planning, Brides say their highest priority is their attire, followed by the reception site and caterer - reception entertainment is among the least of their priorities. Within one week after their reception, 78% of Brides say they would have made the entertainment their highest priority!

When asked 81% of guests say the thing they remember most about a wedding is the entertainment.

65% of all couples that chose a band to entertain at their wedding said, if they had it to do over again, they would have chosen a disc jockey.

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Tracy Painter owns Entertainment Tonite disc jockey service. He has been working with area couples for over 20 years helping them plan their wedding reception entertainment. At Entertainment Tonite, in Pittsburgh, our DJs will work with you to help you plan a perfect wedding reception. Give us a call today at 412-672-4899.

Wedding Planning Guide

Have you always had an idea in your mind about your perfect wedding? Whether it be a simple wedding ceremony at a scenic spot at sunset followed by cocktails; or big church wedding with a full nuptial mass and a formal wedding dinner in one of the best hotels, good planning can help you achieve the wedding you want with a minimum of stress on your big day.

Planning a wedding is a huge job. If you plan your wedding well, you will be able to sit back and enjoy your big day. The first things to consider when you start planning your wedding are your budget, the amount of time you have to devote to the planning, and the amount of control you want to have over the final result. If you have a big budget and very little time, a professional wedding planner may be the way to go. They can assist you with all of your planning needs from booking a celebrant to organising room decorations, wedding music, limousines etc. On the other hand, if you would like to have more control over things and want to have control over your budget, you may like to do your own wedding planning.

Stage 1: Get your wedding venue and celebrant sorted.

Don’t set your date yet! You need to decide upon your ceremony and reception venues. At this stage, if you are having a civil ceremony, you need to make enquiries and secure the services of a wedding celebrant. The date that these are available may affect your choice of wedding date. Do you have your heart set on a particular church or reception venue, or is it more important to you to secure a particular celebrant?

Some popular venues and celebrants can be booked out many months or even years in advance. It is a good idea to be flexible with your wedding date until you have checked out their availability. It may be necessary to have your wedding on a Sunday or a Friday evening so that you can get what you want.

Finding a Wedding Reception Venue

A great venue is essential to the success of your wedding. Most venues have a function coordinator who will manage your wedding. You need to feel comfortable with the function manager as they will play an important roll. If you have a small number of guests a smaller, more intimate venue with a lovely view may be nicer for an afternoon wedding, but the view is not as important if they wedding reception is in the evening.

A few questions to ask:

• Do they have a room suitable for the number of guests you are planning?
• What different packages do they provide for different budgets and styles of wedding?
• Do they provide a drinks package or do they sell alcohol on consumption?
• Are they flexible with regards to vegetarian options/ special dietary needs?
• At what point do you need to finalise the numbers? Will you have to pay for guests who are unable to attend?
• Can you make an appointment to be shown through the venue by the function coordinator?
• Can you make an appointment to try the food and wine they have on their menu?
• What kind of deposit is due upon booking?
• When is the final balance due?
• If you are planning to have live music, is amplification allowed?

Finding a Celebrant:

You need to find someone who can share your vision of your wedding ceremony.

Do they have a set format they like to use or are you able to design your own wedding ceremony? Ideally, you might have a combination of your own words and suggestions by the celebrant.

Religious Ceremonies:
 
If you are having a religious wedding ceremony you should find out what the religious requirements are. Many religions will require you to go to pre-marriage counselling or participate in other special preparations.

Once you have set the date, you need to choose and invite your brides maids and groomsmen.

Legal Requirements:

Once you decide to marry, you are required to give a marriage celebrant at least one month and one days notice (and not more than 18 calendar month’s notice) of an intended date of marriage.

Once you choose a marriage celebrant, they will ask you to complete a Notice of Intended Marriage form which they will provide to you. Alternatively, you can download the form from the Attorney General’s website.

Stage 2: Organise your bridal party.

Once you have chosen your bridal party, you may like to have a chat with your maid of honour and the best man about their responsibilities. You can give them as much or as little as you like. Here are a few ideas:

You may like to ask your Maid of Honour to

• Give moral support to the bride during the wedding preparations and during the wedding itself
• Help with shopping for a wedding dress
• Hold a bridal shower
• Attend wedding ceremony rehearsals
• Help the bride get dressed on the wedding day
• Witness the signing of the register
• Hold the bridal’s flowers during the ceremony

You may ask your best man to:

• Help with formal suit hire for the groomsmen
• Hold a bachelor party
• Attend wedding ceremony rehearsals
• Assist the groom to get ready on the wedding day
• Hold the rings at the ceremony
• Witness the signing of the register
• Propose a toast to the bridesmaids at the reception
• Dance with family members at the reception

Stage 3: Finding Wedding Service Providers and a dress.

After you have set your date and decided upon a wedding ceremony venue and reception venue, it is time to look into other services. A few you may need are:

• Wedding flowers
• Wedding musicians
• Wedding cars
• Wedding cake
• Wedding photographers
• Wedding decorators
• Wedding Stationary
• Wedding Suit Hire

Most brides these days gather their information online, but you can also purchase wedding magazines such as Bride to Be, Cosmo Bride etc. and you may also like to find out what bridal fairs are in your area and attend some. Your friends are a great resource for wedding planning. Ask married friends about their wedding experiences.

At this stage it is a good idea to purchase a note-book, wedding folder or start a new file on your computer to keep track of your information as there will be a lot of it! Put in all of the information you have gathered so far regarding your venue, menus, your celebrant etc. If you are computer savvy, another great way to go is to get your own wedding website. These have great resources for keeping track of all of your information, as well as important information and handy tips.

 
Online:

You can search online for most services either by typing information into your search engine and seeing what comes up, or using one of the many reputable online wedding websites. The quality of a website can tell you a great deal about the quality of the business being promoted. Make sure you create a special bookmark folder in your web browser so that you can easily re-locate the sites you like the look of. Another great resource is wedding planning e-books. If you are not quite sure where to start, there are some great wedding planning e-books which can be purchased online, which can give you some great tips about planning and budgeting for your wedding.

Stage 4: Making enquiries with wedding service providers:

If you have a big budget you may like to hire a company that specialises in wedding decorating. They can help you with our overall theme for your ceremony and reception. Of course, you can always do your own research and theme a wedding yourself. There are some great online resources to help you.

Once you have found some wedding service providers you like the look of, it is time to make some enquiries. The response to your enquiries can serve as a very good indicator of the service you will receive on your wedding day.

• Are their responses prompt?
• Are they friendly and helpful?
• Do they have positive feedback or references from previous clients?
• Do they have experience in the wedding industry?
• Do their services fit in with your budget? If not, do they have some cheaper alternatives?

Stage 5: Booking wedding service providers:

When you want to secure their services, there are a few things you will need to know:

• What kind of deposit do you need and when is the final balance due?
• Do they have public liability insurance?
• What are their booking conditions?
• Will they be flexible with regard to changes in times etc?

Stage 6: The Guest List

Now that you have booked everything, it is time to finalise your guest list. The number of guests will depend on your number of family members and friends you have, and of course, your budget and the constraints of the venue. If you are trying to cut back, consider not inviting people not seen for more than a year or two. Remember…this weeding is about your future, not your past! Invite people who you genuinely believe will make a positive contribution you your future marriage. If you are concerned about the potential for bad behaviour, it is very easy at this stage to exclude those people who you think may cause you stress. This is not about pleasing people, it is about you celebrating your relationship. When sending out invitations, make sure you invite according to the number of people you wish to attend. Do not assume people will decline! Most people will say yes to a wedding invitation. In the even that someone can’t come, you can always have a back-up list of people to ask.

Stage 7: Tying Up the Loose Ends:

Once all of your guests have RSVP’d, you need to confirm the numbers with your venue. You also need to re-confirm all of the wedding service providers in the week before your wedding. Call any important people and make sure they know their responsibilities. Have a final dress fitting and make sure you are happy with the fit. Make sure you speak up if it is not quite right!

Stage 8: The big day.

Hopefully all of your great planning has paid off! You have a long day ahead, so don’t start drinking too early. Have a good protein based breakfast to get you through the day. Have a luxurious bath, get your hair and makeup done and slip into your dress. Make sure you protect your dress from the make-up when you put it on. Get your bridesmaids to assist if necessary. Have a bag ready to go which contains the essentials: a small sewing kit, some makeup and a mini hairspray for touch-ups, a mini deodorant, some breath mints, a toothbrush and toothpaste, and some Paris Tape for any potential wardrobe malfunctions.

And when you arrive at the ceremony……Just enjoy yourself. All the hard work has been done.

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Authored by Jane Hart from Sydney Wedding Music.

Jane Hart from Sydney Wedding Music has extensive interest and experience in the wedding business. This is the first installment in a series of articels to assist you in planning for your big day.

For more information about wedding music and wedding planning, go to www.sydneyweddingmusic.com.au

Do you really want the day to pass without a professional video? As a bride you will be so busy on your wedding day; as a result, it will pass quickly and there will be so much that you will miss, that is, unless you have a really good video. Many brides have commented to us that they enjoyed the video more than they enjoyed the wedding day itself. (see testimonials). You can throw a party with your bridal party and family and watch the video, relive the emotion during the ceremony, enjoy all the funny things that happened, make fun of Uncle Tom’s dance moves at the reception. With the Menu & Chapters, you can just watch the parts that you want. It can be a tool to keep a strong marriage, as some brides have told us they watch it with their husband on anniversaries or during the holidays. You can just sit back, relax, and really take in the day, reliving all those special moments.

This is not a responsibility you want to leave to a family member with a camcorder. He doesn’t have the experience, nor the equipment of a professional. I would say that the first 100 weddings that I filmed were not very good videos. It takes a long time before one really becomes skilled as a videographer to be able to handle all the obstacles you will face during a wedding. A photographer can re-create shots, but a videographer, simply has to be in the right place at the right time. This takes an ability to anticipate, as well as having an attentive eye, an ability to see beyond the surface. Now fourteen years later, I am still evolving as a videographer and as an editor. A professional will have cordless mics. Without cordless mics, you won’t hear the audio during the vows. With our Big Screen Projector you can enjoy the video immediately, as it runs in the background during your reception. We can do unique things like play video of the father walking the bride down the aisle as the two of them share the father-daughter dance. If you are using our DJ service as well, we can show the vows, with the audio from the video, as we play “Lost In This Moment”. It creates a great ending to your reception and leaves your guest impressed with something they have most likely have never seen before.

With the slow motion and the right music, mixed with a well framed steady shot, a cinematic style video is sure to leave you with a greater appreciation for life. You will not only be able to relive it and show your friends and family, but show your kids and grandkids in future generations. A good video is well under $1,000…… ……the cherished memories it captures…… PRICELESS.

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Authored by Randy Markham from Celebrations of Tampa Bay

Randy Markham is the owner of Celebrations of Tampa Bay, which started in 1991 as a DJ and a Harpest.   Today Celebrations of Tampa Bay employs 20 people including Photographers, Videographers, and DJs.

1. Are they really pros?

Recent advancements in technology have made camera equipment and editing software very affordable. The downside of this is that now there are a lot of wannabes calling themselves “cameramen” and “editors” when really they are just “guys with a camera and some software.”

How do you tell the difference? Experience. The ideal cameraman has experience shooting weddings, documentaries and/or live television. These are the people who really understand the art of “anticipate and respond,” which is what you want because when it comes to your wedding, there are no second takes.

Shooting and editing are two separate art forms; make sure that the company you hire to do your video is good at both shooting and editing.

2. What kind of cameras do they use?

Consumer camcorders you see at your local electronics store are typically “single chip” cameras. These are small and lightweight and great for home videos and vacations but are inappropriate for shooting weddings. You want someone with a “three chip camera” (known as a “three CCD” camera).

Three chips produce much clearer and more accurate colours (even in low light) than one chip.

You also want someone who has a wireless lavaliere microphone, a camera-mounted light, a tripod and/or monopod and some extra lights just in case.

Pretty much everyone is shooting on digital tape these days (mini DV or DVCam) so they can do digital editing (also called “non-linear” editing) and output digitally onto DVD. The benefit of keeping the capture, edit and output process in the digital domain is that the footage experiences little to no quality loss. You should definitely hire someone who is up-to-date with digital technology.

3. What kind of lights do they use?

You probably won’t like it if your videographer mounts glaring hot lights on an elaborate scaffolding. After all, this is your wedding, not a film set. The camera equipment should absolutely not compromise the décor and ambiance of the wedding.

An adjustable camera-mounted light works really well. It moves around with the cameraman (who moves around with the couple) and it should be used only when necessary. It should be soft and subtle, and its intensity can be adjusted so it is not overly glaring. The way to find out if the cameraman understands this is to look at his footage and watch for any “deer caught in headlights” reactions from his subjects. The people in the video should not even realize he’s there: they should be enjoying the wedding!

4. What do the cameramen wear?

It’s tough, physical work, but they should be dressed nicely so that they blend into the background. They should not wear jeans, running shoes, etc.

5. Can they do multiple camera shoots?

A 2 camera set-up is ideal if you have the budget for it. Your coverage will be a lot more complete and then your editor can cut between the two cameras for a dynamic and entertaining wedding video.

Just make sure that BOTH cameras are the same quality (three chip) and both cameras are manned by separate qualified cameramen; do not let them leave a camera unattended on a tripod: it can lead to disappointing results.

6. What is their sound quality like?

It is easy to forget about sound when you are thinking of video, but please do not make this mistake. Insist on a videographer that uses a wireless microphone: they are small and unnoticeable and amazing at recording vows, etc.

7. What is their editing style?

This is a very important question! Make sure their style suits your taste. Don’t be seduced by a lot of dazzling animation and special effects - it might not be the look you want. And it might look cheesy in the years to come. Classic simplicity never goes out of style.

8. Do they have a demo DVD?

They had better! Don’t fall for a “music video” or a series of carefully chosen shots timed to music, because anyone can look good that way. Ask to see actual, sequential clips from a wedding (or even an entire wedding) incorporating recorded natural sound mixed with music.

When you are watching the demo DVD, be sure to look for:

• clear, bright picture, even in low light
• clean natural sound
• audible, consistent audio levels
• smooth, non-jerky camera movement
• artistic camera composition
• seamless and dynamic editing
• relaxed bridal party and guests who hardly notice they are being taped

Most importantly, ask yourself, “Is a story being told? Do you feel the emotion of that magical day?” Because after all, you want a video that becomes more valuable as time goes by, something that is true to your personalities and tastes and not some form of torture on your unsuspecting dinner guests in the years to come! A good wedding video will enable you to relive one of the best days of your life.

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Authored by Nishi Dias from Night Day Productions

Nishi Dias is a full-time editor in Toronto. She owns and runs Night Day Productions, a small collective of videographers and photographers who work on weddings, corporate events and creative projects.

Have you ever considered releasing live butterflies at your wedding or reception? Make yours memorable with a butterfly release. Much better than throwing rice, birdseed, releasing balloons or blowing bubbles, a butterfly release is a beautiful way to help repopulate the species.

Several species are available that are indigenous to your state. The butterflies are hand-raised and shipped overnight to your door.

There are two ways to release them: (1) individually where your guests have a chance to “interact” with them before sending them on their way and (2) a mass release where all the butterflies are released at one time, which is a more dramatic way to see them flutter away.

Monarchs are the most-requested butterfly because they are “social.” Once released, they tend to hang around, alighting on flowers and your guests before taking wing. Several other species are available, which can be released if the temperatures are above 60 degrees

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Authored by Linda Marchman from Social Butterflies

Linda Marchman is the owner of Social Butterflies. She has seven years of butterfly-raising experience and is always available to give personal attention to you and your most special event. She is a director of The Association For Butterflies, a member of the International Butterfly Breeders Association, and the Butterfly Society of Virginia. Also a Master Gardener, she gives programs to all type of groups on her favorite subject, BUTTERFLIES!

One of the most exciting new features included in our recent update is the ability for your guests to upload their photos to your website.  We wanted to spend a little more time explaining this great new feature.

Most weddings have 100 or more guests, and most of the guests have digital cameras with which they take lots of photos.  For those of us on the MomentVille team that are married, we know that we would have loved an easy way to get all the best photos from all of our guests.  That is what inspired us to make this feature.

Guests can upload photos to your website through an ‘Upload Photos’ button. This is only found on the new ‘Photo Gallery’ elements.  Recall, you can add as many photos galleries as you’d like, and you can add them to any pages you want.  For instance, you may want to create a page called ‘Your Photos’ and place galleries there for guests to upload photos.

As excited as we are about these feature, however, we have disabled it by default.  If you want your guests to be able to upload their photos, you will need to enable it.  You can enable it in by going to the ‘Settings’ tab, and then to ‘Privacy’. You can read more about how to enable this feature.  

The reason we don’t have it enabled by default is to protect our users.  You enable the feature you must register a security question and answer.  This will help prevent unwanted images.  You can make the question and answer anything you’d like.  For instance, you can ask a question like ‘What is 1 + 1?’ and set the answer to ‘2′.  This would allow all the guests of your wedding website to upload photos easily.  

If you only want a small group of people to be able to upload photos you can set a password by asking ‘what is the password?’ and the answer to ‘apassword’.  After photos have been uploaded to your website you will be notified by email, at which point can you approve or delete the photos.  Only photos that you approve will be shown on your website.

As always, we love to get suggestions about how we can improve our wedding websites!